Keena Ferguson, Kathryn Taylor
  1 out of 5 stars
  Reviewed for Coffeerooms by Mike Jefferson

"ConSINsual's" tag line is "Some doors were never meant to be opened..." Well, some movies were never meant to be filmed.

It's obvious from the get that the main characters, Terrance and Angel Moore, have no business being together for anything other than a cage match. Terrance is a whiny weakling and Angel is a bitchy hellcat. The only thing they have in common is they both get their jollies role playing.

One night a masked intruder breaks into the Moore's abode while the couple is coupling. Terrance leaves Angel in the clutches of the intruder and runs away like Michael Jackson with his Jheri curls on fire. Angel brains the intruder with a bottle, escaping further anatomical invasion. As you can imagine, Angel isn't impressed with her husband's show of cowardice.

Worried that his marriage may be falling apart (ya think?) Terrance listens to the advice of Angel's sister, Jazzmine, a successful and seemingly wise lawyer. Jazzmine tells Terrance to take what he wants - to seize the moment, and, if necessary, Angel. Our not so bright Lothario takes this to mean he can reignite the passion in his marriage by restaging the attack - only this time he'll play the role of the intruder. Terrance grabs Angel, pulls her to the floor and misinterprets her passionate screams as an open invitation to continue. (Which of course it isn't.) Humiliated and angry, Angel goes to the police and Terrance is brought up on rape charges.

At this point you would think a major apology or a loving selfless act by Terrance would somehow repair the damage - and indeed, Angel, on the advice of Jazzmine - drops the charges. But these are some seriously damaged, sinful folk which means there's no guarantee there'll be a happy ending.

One of "ConSINsual's" most blatant problems is the cast, which is wholly inexperienced --and it shows. Keena Ferguson, who plays the morally corrupt, success-driven Angel, has a few scant credits that include Bridesmaid #2 in an episode of "Two and a Half Men" called "Rough Night in Hump Junction." She's hardly the type of siren men, women or aliens would lust after - there are three noticeable divots on the side of her face, she's shaped like an "S" and she telegraphs every stare and sneer. It's much harder to play sexy if you ain't. Carnival looks aside, she's saddled playing a character that's controlling, hateful and impossible to root for, not a quality you want your leading lady to display in abundance.

Siaka Massaquoi (Terrance) is a dead ringer for frog-eyed actor Omar Epps. Too bad he doesn't have Epps' agent. Massaquoi's biggest role prior to Terrance was "bartender." His character is so spineless you won't care if he redeems himself, although he does have the ability to cry on cue.

Kathryn J. Taylor's character of Jazzmine is a classic example of a stereotype meets overly ambitious actor, with the subsequent fallout causing the character to go from cunning to koo koo. A twist in script requires Jazzmine to degenerate from intelligent to perverse to controlling to sadistic. It's too much of a leap and takes the jazz out of Jazzmine. When the reason for her personality shift is revealed you'll still ask yourself why a successful, intelligent, relatively sane person would start acting like the spawn of Ma Barker.

In most films these days there's a character Spike Lee refers to as "the magic Negro." This particular black character is usually the main character's friend, neighbor or co-worker and helps enlighten him or her through their homespun wisdom or a magnificent act of kindness. In black entertainment films the tables are reversed, so you get the obligatory white angel. In this case the faithful best friend is blondie licious Tara, played by Alexis Zibolis. Zibolis seems to be playing an actual person rather than an oversexed cliché. She actually has a resume, having previously played characters with names rather than titles. She appeared in several low-budget sci-fi thrillers including "Plaguers" and "The Blackout," which, compared to the other actors, is like having been in "Gone With the Wind."

Ironically, Zibolis, who can actually shoot a gun, doesn't wield one in the film. Zibolis and Bryan Keith (who plays Terrance's Neanderthal-minded friend, Dillon)  are the only ones who seem to have read the script beforehand and tried to figure out how to leave an impression, good or bad, on the screen.

There are many sins -- gluttony, avarice, coveting thy neighbor's wife and murder. "ConSINsual" tries to incorporate all the sins of the flesh into 98 minutes and makes as much sense as locking a sex offender in a room full of virgins and telling him to play nice. "ConSINsual" is a potentially titillating concept gone awry -- and that's its biggest sin. 



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