|
BATS
Director: Louis Morneau
Written by: I can't find reference.
I think this was smart of them. Admit nothing!
Starring: Lou Diamond Phillips, Dina Meyer, Bob
Gunton
My advice: Skip this. Try a hot poker
in the eye first.
Rating:  It gets a Lemon Award!!!
Small town Gallup, Texas is experiencing a series of inexplicable
bat attacks on the local residents. Oh my God...could anything be scarier? Yes, we could have rounded up the fictional
characters of Gallup and forced them to sit through this movie.
The government calls upon eminent wildlife Zoologist Dr. Sheila
Casper (Meyers - who is, I'll admit, a stunning cross between Sharon Stone, Angelina Jolie and Ashley Judd. You
lose track trying to figure out who she is pretending to be) to investigate. Although usually a harmless and rather
gentle animal, swarms of bats have suddenly become vicious, making Gallup a very dangerous place after the sun
goes down. Sheila teams up with town sheriff Emmett Kimsey (Phillips) to discover why these nocturnal mammals have
changed their behavior. As the attacks escalate, Sheila and Kimsey must locate and destroy the swarm's cave before
the killing spreads. I watched only to be sure they killed them all so there would be no chance of a sequel.
The future looks bright.
Yawn. Yawn. Yawn. Not in a bat's age have I experienced a movie
as poor as this one. It failed in concept, design, acting, premise...blah blah blah. I can not even begin to explain
how awful this movie was without you having to sit through this heinous flick yourself. But that, my movie going
friends, is not something I would wish upon my worst enemy.
|
