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I spend way too much time at the theaters.
I'm a slave to the Hollywood Visionaries.  God help me.

THE 13th WARRIOR

Directed by Michael Crichton & John McTiernan

Written by Warren Lewis & William Wisher,
based on the novel Eaters of the Dead by Michael Crichton

Starring Antonio Banderas, Dennis Storhøi,
Vladimir Kulich, Diane Verona, Omar Sharif

My Advice: Epic and wonderful.  Go see on the big screen.

Rating: out of

Ibn (Banderas) is a beautiful poet and an Arab gentleman who just happens to catch the eye of the wrong woman. Her husband immediately sends Ibn packing north as an ambassador to the denizens there, the Northmen, naturally. However, no sooner does he show up and try to make contact than he finds himself with a band of twelve other warriors to assist a king against a band of unknown attackers who come out of the mist, slaughter their foes, and...um...dine on the remains. Yummy yummy.

I don't care what all the people say, I found this epic. It's beautiful filmwork at it's best and it whisked me right back to the days of Braveheart. Antonio was wonderful and, even in a movie as dark as this, managed to bring about the necessary humor to make the horror not so horrorful.

If you're looking to relive a time when men were noble, the women were brave, and the times were stoic, this is the flick for you. I mean, hot damn, not a one of these guys had a remote in their hands. How's that for fantasy?

 

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